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Speaking about health before pregnancy, we mean way of life, nutrition, physical activity, habits, and also possible chronic diseases, such as heightened blood pressure or diabetes. If you have such diseases, then you just have to visit a doctor beforehand. You know, this may complicate pregnancy, bring harm to an unborn baby. Tell your doctor which medicinal preparations and in which doses you take. Doctor will recommend you tests and observations you should pass, for example, X-ray photography. Try to discuss all questions you have for the moment.
It is much simpler to think over a strategy of treatment before pregnancy and then worrying about complications.
Diabetes
Diabetes - it is a disease, appearing as a result of lack of insulin in organism, this hormone is produced by pancreas. If you have diabetes, it will be more difficult for you to become pregnant. Moreover, diabetes can influence passing of pregnancy seriously. First of all, it can become a reason of miscarriage or giving birth to a dead baby. Secondly, women suffering from diabetes can give birth to babies with inborn defects.
You can reduce risk of such complications due to constant control of sugar content in blood during pregnancy. If you don’t care of your state, then diabetes while pregnancy may turn out to be dangerous both for you and your future baby. Majority of complications, connected with diabetes, are displayed during first trimester, i.e. during first 13 weeks of pregnancy.
Pregnancy may cause complications of state while diabetes, what will require increase of insulin doses. This can be easily determined with help of test on sugar content in blood. Majority of doctors recommend taking a special care of this disease development during at least 2-3 months before conception. This will help to reduce probability of risk of miscarriage or other problems. Probably, you will have to pass tests on sugar content in blood several times per day, to control disease completely and avoid possible complications. Past experience shows that women, suffering from diabetes, had serious problems with conception and passing of pregnancy. But die to complete and constant control even women-diabetics can count on successful result of pregnancy and delivery.
If in your family there were cases of diabetes or you have slightest suspicions as for your own health, pass tests before pregnancy surely.
Asthma
About 1% of pregnant women suffer from asthma. It is impossible to predict influence of pregnancy on asthma. Half of women, suffering from this disease, notice no changes during pregnancy, about 25% feel even slight improvement, and the rest (25%) observe worsening of state.
Majority of anti-asthma remedies are safe for pregnant, but it is still better to consult a doctor as for preparation to take. Almost all who suffer from asthma know what may become a reason of fit, so avoid contact with allergens before getting pregnant and during whole pregnancy. Try to control your state yet before pregnancy.
Hypertension
Hypertension, or high blood pressure, can cause complication both of mother’s and unborn baby’s health. For women it is connected with risk of refusal of kidneys work, probability of hypertensic crisis or headache. Increase of a future mother’s blood pressure may become a reason for decrease of blood inflow to placenta, what will lead to delays of fetus development, i.e. a baby will weigh less, than normal while birth.
If you had high blood pressure before pregnancy, then you just have to take care of it during all 9 months. Probably, gynaecologist will send you to therapeutist’s or family doctor’s observation with this purpose.
Before making a decision to become pregnant, women, suffering from hypertension, should consult a doctor. Some remedies against high blood pressure are safe for pregnant, some are not. On no account quit taking pills and reduce dose without a doctor’s prescription! This can be dangerous. If you plan giving birth to a baby, ask you doctor about remedies you are taking against high blood pressure, and about safety of taking these medicines during pregnancy.
Heart diseases
During pregnancy load on heart increases about 50%. If you have sick heart, it is necessary for your doctor to know about it before you become pregnant.
Some heart diseases, such as mitral valve prolapse, can seriously complicate passing of pregnancy. Probably, you will even have to take antibiotics before delivery. Other heart diseases, such as inborn heart disease, may seriously influence state of health. In this case pregnancy and delivery are sometimes contra-indicated.
Consult your doctor as for heart diseases before you become pregnant.
Kidneys and urinary bladder diseases
Infections of urinary system, in particular urinary bladder, often appear during pregnancy. If you don’t cure disease in time, infection may pass to kidneys, causing pyelonephritis.
Infections of urinary bladder and pyelonephritis may lead to premature birth. If you ever suffered from pyelonephritis or repeating infections of urinary system, this should be determined before pregnancy.
Stones in kidneys also may complicate passing of pregnancy. This disease is accompanied by severe pains in lower part of belly, so it is quite difficult to diagnose it during pregnancy. Moreover, stones in kidneys may become a reason of appearance of infections of urinary system and pyelonephritis.
If you ever had some only infection of urinary bladder, you should not worry a lot. But you still should inform your doctor about it. He will decide whether you need to pass more careful observation before pregnancy.
Thyroid gland diseases
Thyroid gland diseases may appear both because of excess or lack of thyroid hormone. Excess of hormone is called thyrotoxicosis. In this case metabolism in human organism is speeded up. This may be caused by Graves’ disease. Thyrotoxicosis is usually cured with help of operation of medicinal remedies, reducing content of thyroid hormone in organism. If you don’t cure this disease, there’s rather high level of risk premature birth and giving birth to a baby with low weight.
You can carry our treatment during pregnancy too: there’re quite safe preparations, which pregnant women may take.
Lack of thyroid hormone - hypothyroidism - is usually caused by disease of autoimmune origin. In this case thyroid gland is damaged by anti-bodies, which are produced by your organism. While hypothyroidism taking of thyroid hormones is prescribed. Not cured hypothyroidism threatens with sterility or habitual noncarrying of pregnancy.
If you have thyrotoxicosis or hypothyroidism, you need to pass through observation before pregnancy, to determine doses of medicinal remedies, necessary for treatment. In the process of pregnancy your necessity in preparations may change, and then you will have to pass another observation.
Anemia
Anemia means that there’s lack of haemoglobin in your organism. There’re several reasons and in connection with this several kinds of anemia. Symptoms of anemia are weakness, giddiness, lack of air and pale skin.
During pregnancy necessity of organism in iron and iron-containing substances increases. If in the beginning of pregnancy you suffer from lack of iron in blood, anemia increases this lack. So you need to take vitamins and preparations, containing full choice of microelements, necessary for organism.
One of specific types of anemia - sicle-cell disease, which is passed genetically: it is mainly spread among black population. If you suffer from sicle-cell disease, your organism is deprived of oxygen. Passing of this kind of anemia can be very painful, and it also may serve as a reason for other diseases and complications during pregnancy. Sicle-cell disease cannot be cured and may be passed to your baby. Women, suffering from sicle-cell disease, have very high percent of miscarriages and infections of urinary system. They also may suffer from high blood pressure and painful hypertension strokes.
Another kind of anemia - thalassanemia is also passed genetically. If some of your relatives suffers from thalassanemia or you suppose you can have it, check it before pregnancy.
Lupus
Lupus is a vascular disease of autoimmune origin. This means your organism produces anti-bodies that may destroy your organs or influence functions of these organs negatively. Lupus can affect different organs, including joints, kidneys, lungs and heart.
This disease is hard to diagnose. One woman of 700 in the age from 15 to 64 years suffers from lupus. Among black women it is met more often, in one case of 254. As a rule, lupus more often strikes women, than men, especially women of genital age, i.e. from 20 to 40 years.
Lupus treatment is highly individual and usually means taking if steroids. It is better not to become pregnant during fit of this disease, as miscarriages are extremely often among women suffering from lupus. Risk of giving birth to a dead baby also increases.
Babies, born from mothers, suffering from lupus, can have rash. They also can have different heart diseases. Premature birth and delay of pre-natal development of fetus are also quite possible.
If you suffer from lupus, consult your doctor before pregnancy definitely.
Epilepsy and epileptic seizures
Epilepsy - is a chronic disease, characterized by different kinds of seizures (fits). Most often epilepsy is displayed by big and small epileptic seizures. Chance of giving birth to a baby with epileptic disease can be 1 of 30 for women, suffering from epilepsy. Such babies have risk of in-born diseases, probably, connected with medicines, which a future mother took during pregnancy.
If you take medicines against epilepsy, it is very important to consult your doctor before pregnancy. Discuss doses and type of medicines, which you take, as many preparations, relieving seizures of epilepsy, cause in-born diseases in babies. However, there are safe remedies for fetus, for example, Phenobarbital.
Seizures can be dangerous both for mother and fetus. So it is especially important to take remedies precisely according to a doctor’s prescription during pregnancy. On no account reduce dose or quit taking medicine yourself, without a doctor!
Migraine
About 15-20% of all pregnant women suffer from migraine. Many women notice improvement of health during pregnancy. If you are going to take pills against headache during pregnancy, check with your doctor how much they are safe for you and future baby.
Cancerous growths
A question of probability of cancer’s influence on pregnancy depends on the fact which organ it stroke and how wide is growth. Breast cancer is most often form of cancer, met among women. If you had breast cancer, this will not influence pregnancy anyway, and pregnancy, in its turn, will not cause breast cancer.
Many doctors advice to wait 2-3 years with childbirth after breast cancer treatment. It is very important to discuss case history and method of treatment with your doctor yet before pregnancy. Situation may become quite complicated, if you are pregnant and pass treatment at the same time. Many medicines and remedies against cancer are not safe for future mother and baby.
Other diseases
We examined only some chronic diseases. However, any disease can be dangerous for future baby. So if you suffer from some chronic disease or have to take medicines constantly, discuss it with your doctor.
General rule is following: it is better not to take medicines or pass any medical treatment at the moment of conception and on early stages of pregnancy. Laying of all organs and tissues of a baby takes place during 1st trimester of pregnancy, and during this period you need to protect a future baby from harmful influences of medicines or observations. You will feel better and calmer, if you solve all these problems before pregnancy.
Yana Mikheeva is the creator of Baby Health Directory - Pregnancy, Birth, Parenting and Baby Care resources. Are you going to get pregnant? Visit our friendly resource and read information on pregnancy and parenting, painless childbirth, growth and development of a baby, baby health, safety, signs of pregnancy.
She also has All about women site where you can find articles on various subjects, such as: diets, receipts, health, cellulite, figure, aromatherapy, wholesome food, psychology of relationships, pregnancy, parenting, fashion and many others.
Breathing in fresh air - there’s nothing quite like it. For baby, too, it’s very important to get out in the fresh air regularly, if you possibly can. If not, try and make sure the nursery is well ventilated, allowing a reasonable flow of fresh air through the room. Stale, stagnant air tends to harbour germs and dust mites, neither of which does baby any good. Avoid enclosing the cot with curtains or anything else that might restrict the flow of air.
It’s also good to try and keep baby in a well ventilated room during waking hours as well, preferably not one that’s over heated and stuffy. Nowadays we have a tendency to heat our houses to such a level that it’s possible to walk around in a T-shirt no matter what time of year it is. Turn the heating down, and dress baby a little more warmly - it will be much better for baby’s health.
The best fresh air, of course, can be found outside. Naturally your fresh air expeditions have to be suited to the season, and the weather on the day. Remember that babies are quite resilient, and if well wrapped up and with a warm hat on their head, will still enjoy going for a stroll outside as long as the weather is clear. Some strollers and prams have rain hoods that can be attached in the event of a shower, but it’s not a good idea to use one for the whole of the walk - baby won’t be getting a lot of good, healthy fresh air, just recycling the same air over and over again. So you’re basically wasting your time. Still, it’s handy to have one available to cover the stroller if an unexpected shower occurs.
Infants love to be taken to new environments, particularly once they’re able to sit in a stroller and look around them. A walk to the local park can provide enormous enjoyment to your child, as well as lots of fresh air. Even something as simple as being under a tree, lying in his pram and gazing up at the leaves moving in the wind, provides great entertainment for your baby. So don’t worry too much about having to think of new, exotic locations to visit with your baby every time you go out. Remember that babies like the simple things best, and there are plenty of those available for free.
Discover more great parenting tips at Info About Baby You can sign up for a FREE Baby Tips newsletter at Baby Tips Newsletter. The author’s book about babies is available at Baby’s First Year
It is commonly recognized that breast milk is the best possible nutrition for an infant and more and more women are choosing to breastfeed their babies. But what happens if breastfeeding is not possible? Many people would suggest that the only alternative is to bottle feed formula. But, due to the improvement in breast pumps over the past decade or so, an increasing number of women are making the decision to exclusively pump breast milk for their babies.
Exclusively pumping, or exclusively expressing, is exactly as the term suggests. A woman exclusively uses a breast pump to induce and maintain lactation as opposed to breastfeeding. Some women begin to exclusively pump after initially starting to breastfeed, however, due to various problems or concerns switch to exclusively pumping.
The reasons for exclusively pumping are extremely varied: latching difficulties, illness of the mother or baby, prematurity, separation, and, for some women, the decision to exclusively pump is made prior to the birth of their babies. The reasons women make the choice to exclusively pump prior to delivery are also very diverse.
There is a wide range of normal when it comes to exclusively pumping. The range of experience can extend from constantly struggling to maintain a supply that is sufficient for the needs of your baby to producing far in excess of what your baby requires on a daily basis. Most women can at least meet the needs of their babies and can do so for several months. Many women exclusively pump for up to twelve months or even longer.
One of the most difficult aspects of exclusively pumping is maintaining a frequent pumping schedule. However, most women are able to drop pumping sessions and, by adding time to their remaining sessions, continue to produce similar volumes of milk. Many women are able to eventually pump as little as four times a day, and some as few as two or three, without losing significant volume.
Regardless of the reason a woman comes to exclusively pump, all women who choose to fed their babies by this method have one important thing in common: a strong belief that breast milk is the best possible nutrition for their baby and a willingness to provide breast milk by any means possible.
Stephanie Casemore is the author of Exclusively Pumping Breast Milk: A Guide to Providing Expressed Breast Milk for Your Baby. She exclusively pumped for one year for her son who was born nine weeks premature. Casemore also maintains her website, ExclusivelyPumping.com, which is a resource site dedicated solely to the needs of women who are exclusively expressing breast milk. She is working to educate women on the option of exclusively pumping to ensure women know there is an alternative to formula feeding when breastfeeding is not possible or does not work out.
Fathers are not normally associated with child rearing activities and there are some things that can change that belief. It is not how much time you spend with your children but the quality of time you spend with them.
It’s no surprise that with companies demanding more or parent’s time and paying less for that time, many moms and dads are becoming frustrated and guilty about no spending the kind of time they would like with their children. So what’s a dad to do? Get connected. The new wave of the future involves video-conferencing and it is proving that it can be a valuable parenting tool.
Today video-conferencing is quickly becoming the extraordinary all-around effort to assist dads in maintaining a loving relationship with their children, whether it involves his once-a-month trips to New York, or frequent short trips around the home state, videoconferencing is will quickly become a marvelous way to supplement dad’s effort to stay connected.
Older children will find video-conferencing offering them to opportunity to give more and get more from dad than is received by phone or email. You will need Broadband Internet access to make the hook-ups work well. Web cameras like Quickcam by Logitech sells from $49.99 to $99.99; and high end cams; i.e. like those for Sony offer a complete set-top video-conferencing unit, with lifelike images for the television screen for about $5000.
It is important to note that video-conferencing as a mode of communication with your children is currently operating on land that has yet to be charted. The research is still not in, but from the comments received from parents living and working out of state and out of the U.S. , it’s the next best thing to being there.
There is no doubt that video-conferencing will affect different children differently, and parents must watch closely to see what the experience means to their child, but as it stands today parent-child video-conferencing seems likely to grow.
As the technology improves, we may only be a few steps away for saying…”Beam me up Scotty!”
Detra D. Davis is a certified Parent Educator with the North Carolina Parent Network and has been a writer for over 25 years. Visit her website http://www.supportingourchildren.com, a membership site supporting parents, schools, parent organizations and support groups that encourage parent education and parent involvement.
The No Child Left Behind Act of 2001 is making the problem of cheating, low academic standards, and public schools lying to parents, even worse. Under this Act, the Department of Education now requires students to pass standardized tests. Failing schools will lose federal funding and other perks if their students consistently turn in a bad performance on these tests.
Holding schools and teachers accountable, and expecting students to demonstrate what they’ve learned, sounds like a good idea. But this Act means that badly-taught students, victims of dumbed-down texts and bad teaching methods like new math and whole-language instruction, now have to pass difficult standardized tests they are not ready for.
As a result, millions of students may fail these tests, not because they are dumb, but because the schools never taught them to read properly or solve a math problem without a calculator. Millions of high school students with low reading and math skills now risk not graduating from high school until they pass these tests.
It is important that parents know the unvarnished truth about their children’s real academic abilities, but many parents are now frantic because they see their children’s failing grades on these new tests. As a result, they complain to school boards that they do not want their children taking these tests or not graduating from high school because of low test scores. To protect their children, many parents are now demanding dumbed-down tests to make sure that their kids graduate from high school and go to college.
The No Child Left Behind Act is now forcing many parents to condone schools that dumb-down their tests and standards, instead of blaming these schools for their children’s failure to learn. This is a typical unintended consequence of more government laws that try to fix problems that a government-controlled school system created in the first place.
State lawmakers in New York, Wisconsin, Massachusetts, and other states have yielded to parent pressure. They have scrapped or watered-down high-stakes graduation tests that proved too tough even for students in the so-called better schools in the suburbs.
In Wisconsin, state legislators backed off plans to require high school graduation tests because of strong opposition by parents from affluent suburbs. One parent group calling itself “Advocates for Education” argued that high-stakes testing would not be fair to children and would hurt educational quality in the schools.
Critics of the graduation tests were worried that the tests would put too much pressure on the children. Suburban parents lobbied parent-teacher organizations, and state legislators eventually scrapped the graduation test before a single high-school student had taken it.
Similarly, New York and Massachusetts officials yielded to pressure by parents to set low passing grades for their new graduation tests. In Virginia and Arizona, state boards of education have backed away from graduation tests that were too tough for even the so-called better schools. Only 7 percent of schools in Virginia met new achievement standards, and 9 out of 10 sophomores in Arizona schools failed a new math test.
In New York City, school authorities estimated that over 30 percent of the city’s 11th-graders would not be eligible to graduate if the English language standard that will take effect next year was being applied today. Diane Ravitch of the Brookings Institute in Washington is a longtime analyst of New York’s public-school system She estimated that in some neighborhoods, less than 5 percent of high-school seniors would qualify to graduate under the new standards.
Parents, particularly those with younger children, should take heed. You don’t want to end up with high-school kids who may not graduate because they can’t pass the new tests. In Chapters 8, 9, and the Resource section of “Public Schools, Public Menace,” I explore how you can circumvent these serious problems by finding real education alternatives outside the public schools.
Joel Turtel is an education policy analyst, and author of “Public Schools, Public Menace: How Public Schools Lie To Parents and Betray Our Children.”
Contact Information:
Website: http://www.mykidsdeservebetter.com,
Email: lbooksusa@aol.com,
Phone: 718-447-7348.
Article Copyrighted © 2005 by Joel Turtel
NOTE: You may post this Article on another website only if you set up a hyperlink to Joel Turtel’s email address and website URL, http://www.mykidsdeservebetter.com
What’s a party without a cake? It’s one of the highlights of most parties, and baby showers are no exception. Along with the gifts and the games, baby shower cakes bring an added dimension of beauty and enjoyment to these gatherings among friends and family to celebrate the coming of a baby. They are not only for the pleasure of the parents-to-be, but also for the guests who have come to share in the expecting couple’s good fortune.
One of the great things about baby shower cakes is that the designs and flavors from which to choose are virtually limitless. If you’re the party organizer (whether you’re the parent or a friend or family member) you are able to customize the looks and taste of these types of party cakes. If you’re the type of person who enjoys baking and are able to create attractive and fantastic-tasting cakes, then you might want to bake one and give it to the mother-to-be as a gift. You can design a cake based on what you feel the parents-to-be will appreciate and enjoy, or you can browse the many sites focusing on baby party cakes for inspiration. Just make sure to bake a trial cake or two in advance, especially if it’s your first time to make a baby shower cake. You wouldn’t want any nasty surprises (like a funny-tasting cake or a lopsided cake) on the special day itself.
But if you plan to order one from bakeries or companies that offer baby shower cakes, prepare for the wide variety of party cakes that these establishments offer. But be sure to place your order well ahead of time, since bakers might not be able to accommodate your request on short notice because of earlier orders they might have already received. If you have a baker from whom you get your baked goods regularly, so much the better. He or she will be happy to accommodate a long-time customer and you two can sit down and discuss how you want the cake to look like. Even better, the baker will be able to suggest the best cake designs and flavors that will fit your budget.
Many bakeries also have web sites from which you can place your order. This is great if local options are not available to you. The kinds of baby party cakes they sell cover a large range of flavors: you can choose from chocolate cake, sponge cake, cheesecake, carrot cake, gingerbread cake, pound cake, and more! Many of them also offer different fillings for a more delicious cake: chocolate, custard, jams, fruits, among others. These cakes can be topped with conventional icing or with fondants. Either way, they can come in practically any shape and size; from popular cartoon characters to angels and fairies to sports paraphernalia. Or if the shower is being held after the baby’s arrival, you can even have a picture of the baby as the cake’s main design - sort of an edible portrait.
There is another kind of baby shower cake; one that is not edible, but is nevertheless admired both by the parents-to-be and the guests alike. It’s called a diaper cake and is made up of baby supplies arranged in such a way to resemble a multi-tiered cake. Seen from a distance, they can look like real cakes. Some diaper cakes are really made up of diapers that are rolled and folded into tiers and embellished with ribbons to make them look very attractive. But many other diaper cakes have, in addition to diapers, other baby paraphernalia, such as feeding bottles, bibs, towels, plush toys, and bath supplies. Any person can make an attractive diaper cake, but they are available commercially as well. Specialists include Baby Cakes Inc., whose creations have been featured on TV shows like “Oprah” and the comedy “Sex and the City.” This company offers a multitude of diaper cake designs and themes, from whimsical and cute motifs for baby girls to sporty looks for baby boys, and many others suitable for either sex.
Baby shower cakes, whether they are the edible or non-edible kind, make for attractive and pleasing centerpieces at baby showers. They are an essential part of these festive gatherings and play an important role in making the event a memorable one for both the expectant parents and their guests.
Your-babyshower.com provides you with information on all kinds of babyshower related issues like baby shower cakes, invitations, gifts, games and more. Come take a look at http://www.your-babyshower.com/
Night Visits From Your Child
In the middle of the night you hear, trip, trip, trip and your bedroom door opens. It’s not hard to imagine who it is and when you feel your little one climbing into your bed, you are sure.
Rest assured, this behavior is both common and healthy. Your toddler or preschooler is searching for comfort and security and you are the one in his or her mind that provides for it. Plus, nature has a built in mechanism that, almost automatically, causes you to provide for that need.
When you and or your toddler are really losing a lot of sleep because of these night visits, it’s a different story. Using one of five proven methods to encourage your toddler to stay in his bed throughout the night. Find the one that works best for you by experimentation.
However, before I explain these methods, it’s important to remember this: Don’t send mixed messages to your toddler. Learn from the following example about a woman who very gently and responsibly taught her child to stay in his own bed all night.
Although she wanted her little one to sleep in his own bed, she also enjoyed the closeness with her child. What happened? She couldn’t sleep and in the middle of the second night she got in the little ones bed! So, back to square one. Before you decide on a plan of action, get in touch with your own feelings about the matter. If there is one thing that children are very good at picking up, it is your uncertainty.
Have you ever told your child, No when he or she wanted a cookie? If you really meant no way, chances are that your child realized that No was the end of it, but if you thought, Oh well, one cookie.., then all was lost. Your child easily picked up your emotions through your hesitation. Children are experts in picking up your emotions! Therefore it is very important not to sent mixed messages. Know what you want and stick to it. If I got a dime for every time one of my childs started to “negotiate with me” (and often won), I would now have a nice sum in the bank.
Also consider:
Lets say you and your partner agree that it’s okay that baby stays in his own bed. So, how do you proceed?
These methods are by no means the Holy Grail. Try those that suit you best and you will definitely notice a huge improvement.
Always remember to be patient. In teaching little children, things often take longer than they do with adults. Whatever you do, be firm but loving. Don’t leave your child out in the cold. Let your child know that his or her well-being is your main concern.
Linda is mother of two, she is an inspired author of the
http://www.baby-strollers-guide.com and the
http://www.baby-product-guides.com
Michael Grose’s
10 Commandments for Parenting
Here are the wisest commandments ever commended to parents:
1.Thou shalt be consistent. Do as you say you will. Children know where they stand when you are consistent, follow through and mean what you say.
2.Thou shalt expect children to contribute (without being paid). Expect children to help at home but don’t expect them to do so graciously all the time. Here is a question to ask yourself from time to time: What do your children do that someone else relies on?
3.Thou shalt encourage regularly and persistently. Remember that encouragement and praise will get children a lot further than criticism and punishment so be your child’s best encourager rather than his fiercest critic. Encouragement helps a child link his or her self-esteem to the process, rather than the results of what they do.
4.Thou shalt put responsibility where it belongs. Treat children and young people as you want them to be. If you want responsible, capable children then treat them as if they are responsible. The best way to develop responsibility is to give it to children.
5.Thou shalt be know that children and young people only see one side of any issue. Thou shalt take everything they say with a large grain of salt. Not that children and young people lie, but they have been known to exaggerate or see facts only from their side.
6.Thou shalt show love and affection to your children. Thou shalt say you love each of your children at least once a day. Knowing they are loveable is the basis of self worth, regardless of their age.
7.Thou shalt catch children and young people behaving well. Pay attention to your children’s positive behaviour more than their negative behaviour. What you focus on expands so if you focus on the positive behaviour that is what you generally get. Give descriptive feedback so that your children know what they did well. E.g. “That was great the way you two worked out the TV-watching problem without arguing. You both compromised a little which is smart.”
8.Thou shalt develop independence in children from the earliest possible age. Never regularly do for a child the things he or she can do for him or herself. Remember, your job is to make yourself redundant.
9.Thou shalt set limits and boundaries for children and expect that they will push against them. Children and young people need limits and boundaries as they make them feel secure.
10.Thou shalt keep a sense of humour when dealing with children. This will help you keep things in perspective. It may seem improbable some days but they will soon grow up and be out of your hair and be a living, breathing reflection of YOU.
The 11th (and most important )commandment:
Thou shalt be a good role model for your children. Show rather than tell children and young people how you want them to communicate, behave and live. Children learn what they live and, as parents, your actions speak louder than your words.
Enjoy!
For information about Michael’s Parent Boot Camps, workshops and Parent Coaching programs visit www.parentingideas.com.au
Michael Grose is a popular parenting educator and parent coach. He is the director of Parent Coaching Australia, the author of six books for parents and a popular presenter who speaks to audiences in Australian Singapore and the USA. For free courses and resources to help you raise happy kids and resilient teenagers visit www.parentingideas.com.au
One of the most important things in getting you baby to sleep properly is for your baby to learn to sleep on his or her own.
The reason it is so difficult for many parents - why parents of a newborn suffer from so many sleepless nights - is because your baby, at first, isn’t used to sleeping on his own, and when he wakes up in the night he cries for his mother: being in the presence of his mother is only way he knows how to get to sleep.
It is natural that this transition from sleeping with the mother, to sleeping on his own, will take some time for your baby.
Many baby sleep tips involve setting up a strict nighttime routine, and introducing objects - such as stuffed animals - into the bed that your baby can associate with sleep.
If you find after some months that your baby is still not able to sleep on his own, you can try what is known as the Ferber method.
Invented by Dr. Richard Ferber, the Ferber method is the most common way of weaning your child away from the mother, in terms of his sleep habits.
It is usually successful within a couple of weeks. Nevertheless, it is important that you choose a week where you can afford to lose some sleep to begin the Ferber method.
Especially at the beginning of the process, the Ferber method does require that you spend a lot of time listening to your baby crying, and if you attempt it at a time when you are desperate to sleep, you run the risk of breaking down and allowing your child to sleep with you, or sleeping in the room with him.
If you do so you risk undoing a lot of work that you will have put into the method.
The first night you attempt the Ferber method, put your child to bed as you normally do. Your baby should be tired but still awake when you put him to bed, so that he is left to fall asleep on his own.
After you leave the room, the baby will inevitably start crying. Allow him to cry for about 5 minutes, then re-enter the room to console him.
It’s important that you stay in the room for only a short time - even if he is still crying - and that you don’t pick him up or rock him. This second time you leave the room, wait 10 minutes before returning in the same manner.
The third time wait 15 minutes, and set this as a maximum wait time for the rest of the night.
Every time thereafter, enter the room briefly and then allow your child to cry for 15 minutes.
Eventually, he will fall asleep on his own during one of the 15 minute intervals in which you are out of the room.
The second night, you should begin with a 10 minute wait before re-entering the room, followed by 15 and then 20 minutes. In a similar fashion, increase your initial and subsequent wait times by 5 minutes each night.
Using this method your child will soon learn to go to sleep on his own.
Although it can be difficult to listen to your baby cry, understand that the Ferber method is a safe and effective way of getting your baby to learn to sleep on his own.
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